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What my grandparents taught me, that my parents couldn't.

By Blog, Parenting, Uncategorized

When I was a kid, my dad worked a lot of hard long hours and was the bread winner. He provided a nice house, 2 cars, vacations, lots of Seattle Mariner games, and great Christmases and birthdays. You could say we were middle to upper middle class. My mom chose to work and her paychecks were hers to do with what she wanted. We rarely saw her. My sister and I were latch key kids, unless we were with my grandparents. Almost all school breaks and summers were spent at my grandparent’s home in the foothills of Mt. Hood in Oregon. It was my grandparents who taught us to do things like garden, cook, sew, fish, fix things, clean something well, be helpful and kind to elderly neighbors and respect all adults. They taught us about the historical times they lived through, such as The Great Depression, WWII, the assassination…

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What if we had done "Family" right 60 years ago?

By Blog, Family, Uncategorized

With the economy growing still worse and the cost of child care and preschools on the rise, mothers are feeling the stress to be both nurturer and provider, in addition to the responsibilities they are already burdened with. Both parents are feeling the pressure to depend on child care or school institutions so they can work longer hours to make ends meet. To make matters worse, our parents and grandparents are getting older and the economy has affected their ability to afford the independent lifestyle and the senior communities they had hoped to settle into. My question is this… What if families had it right generations ago? What if the solution to everyone’s problem is to institutionalize neither our children nor our parents? What if we refuse this outsourcing and isolation of our precious family members and return to the natural way families dealt with similar challenges since the beginning…

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The "Visionary" Parent vs. the "In the Moment" Parent

By Blog, Parenting, Uncategorized

Which one are you? I define them as this: The In the Moment parent (ITM) takes each moment or challenge at face value. They put a lot of stock in a child’s resistance to anything. They dwell much longer and deeper on why a child might be throwing a fit or refuse to go to bed at night. They believe that there must be a real, urgent, even medical reason for all of it. ITM parents look at each isolated situation and try to solve the immediate problem, eliminating whatever it is that is making their child cry, resist, or have a melt-down. If that can’t be pinpointed, it must be a disorder of some kind causing the child to act out in a negative way. They believe that their job as parents is to make their child happy, all the time. And if they feel they are failing this…

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2 Breast milk plus healthy sleep habits may help prevent Autism Spectrum Disorders?

By Blog, UncategorizedNo Comments

Finally, some answers from mainstream medical community about the connection between Autism Spectrum Disorders and Gastrointestinal issues! This information may help in early detection. And in my opinion, it may also make the case for how important it is to exclude even one drop of formula from your baby’s diet and do whatever it takes to ensure your baby receives your breast milk exclusively for the first year of his life. Once formula is introduced its gastrointestinal effects are irreversible, even if mostly breastfed. You’ll notice in the following study, sleep plays a role, too. Here’s what Dr. Sears had to say about it… Please feel free to share your thoughts and experiences with ASD here or on my Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/JenniJuneBabyPlanner?fref=ts

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How to REALLY have balance between work and family

By Blog, Family, Uncategorized

A successful way to reconcile our work and family responsibilities is by creating a family plan that complements rather than competes against our business plan. All business experts stress the importance of creating a thorough strategic business plan before starting a business or a new business initiative. Working women now need to learn how to prepare a family plan as well, because we do not want success in business to come at the expense of happiness in our marriage and family life. A certified baby planner can help professional women create an efficient and strategic family plan that will not only enhance their ability to do it all, but ensure their success through sustainability. Sustainability is the key to thriving rather than merely surviving. Your marriage, your business, just about everything valuable to you is dependent on a strong plan that will help you weather the inevitable storms in daily…

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Dr. Weissbluth's Wisdom on Temperament Anxiety

By Blog, Uncategorized

In Sunday’s New York Times, there is an article discussing the links between temperament and anxiety. My discovery of the link between sleep duration and temperament originally published in 1981 was selected for re-publication in the Annual Progress in Child Psychiatry and Child Development by Chess and Thomas whose temperament research was referenced in the NYT piece. Basically, I discovered that 4- month-old infants with an easy temperament had long sleep durations and those with difficult temperaments had short sleep durations. The same group of 4-month-old infants were studied again at age 3 years and the same results were found for the three year olds! But there was very little individual stability of temperament traits between 4 months and three years. Some easy infants became difficult toddlers and some difficult infants became easy toddlers. Sleep durations exactly predicted which direction the infants would take! The more sleep the infants had…

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Best Bonding with Baby Basics

By Blog, Uncategorized

The top five key factors that positively affect parent-infant bonding: 1. Skin to skin contact– Right out of the chute! In fact there is so much evidence supporting this that the World Health organization and UNICEF have implemented the Baby Friendly Hospital Initiative all over the world and in the U.S. which sets policy and trains medical staff to encourage exclusive breastfeeding and immediate skin to skin contact within the first hour after a vaginal delivery, within two hours of a cesarean birth. This skin to skin between mother and child not only encourages better latch and breastfeeding success, but helps prevent a number of health risks for both mom and baby. I have witnessed that continued skin to skin cuddling and feedings with both parents throughout ‘the 4th trimester’ further connect the family on a most intimate level and dramatically decrease the potential for post-partum depression in women. 2….

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What influences you the most as a parent?

By Blog, Uncategorized

There are two powerful types of influence for a parent. One is external and the other is internal. Some parents are influenced by what others say are the best workshops, child-rearing books, Mommy and Me classes, pop-culture parenting fads. These are external influences. They feel good about their parenting if they are doing all the things their friends are doing and are culturally popular in the moment. They tend to raise children who are externally influenced too. If their friend tells them they have to read Dr. So-in-so’s parenting book because it’s the best, that is all an externally influenced parent needs to hear to be convinced to read it and that it is. Parents who are internally influenced are much harder to convince of anything. They feel they just know what works, the proof comes from inside. They have an internal frame of reference and tend to contemplate and…

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The only 'top ten' parenting list that matters

By Blog, Uncategorized

It seems, that with the best of intentions,  we parents sometimes focus too much on the outward compliance of our children and how they are viewed by others. The frightening result is that the heart of our child is completely missed as we aim to make our children our trophies, viewing them as a direct reflection of who we are. What we end up doing is losing the critical ability to influence them as we strive to gain outward conformity from them. The ability to raise kids who feel truly loved and accepted, regardless of their shortcomings, lack of maturity or shallow values, is therefore lost, because without knowing and capturing the heart of a child, you have no influence. It is no wonder so many good families with good values are not able to pass their values down to their children and find them rebelling and looking elsewhere for…

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INTERMITTENT REINFORCEMENT AND RESISTANCE TO EXTINCTION

By Blog, Uncategorized

A lot of families call me to help them when intermittent reinforcement methods are not working. This study may shed light on the situation. One of the useful principles discovered by behavioral psychologists is that intermittent reinforcement increases resistance to extinction. The word intermittent means not every time. Intermittent reinforcement contrasts with continuous reinforcement. Under conditions of continuous reinforcement, the organism is reinforced every time it makes the required response. What effects do continuous and intermittent reinforcement have upon speed of extinction? Why? For example, under continuous reinforcement, every time the rat hits the bar, it receives a food pellet. Under intermittent reinforcement, the rat might be required to hit the bar 50 times to get the pellet, or the rat might be reinforced only once every five minutes, or the rat might be reinforced only when you are in the room, or in accordance with some other pattern, but…

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What is a sanctimommy?

By Blog, Uncategorized

“The sanctimommy knows how you should raise your children. Specifically, she knows what foods they should eat, what toys they should be allowed to play with; heck, sanctimommy even knows how you should have given birth…”  (Source unknown) Do you have any of these in your life? It used to be that one only had to side step topics on politics and religion in certain conversations to keep peace. Today, there is so much sanctimonious judgment from parents and even maternity and parenting practitioners that we can probably add “parenting” to this list as well. New moms confide in me constantly how they feel overwhelming judgment from lactation consultants to doulas, and preschool teachers to other parents. My biggest concern with this is that it chips away at the one thing all parents need in a healthy society. Confidence. Without confidence we cannot safely lead our children. Nor can we…

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Self-check: Are you an overindulgent parent?

By Blog, Uncategorized

Time for another Jenni June self-check!  I love and hate this one… I have to perform this self-evaluation more than I’d like to admit, and you may too, once we lift the veil on the causes and excuses of overindulgent parenting. We tend to think that overindulgence happens when we are overcome with love for our children and want to go above and beyond to put a smile on their face.  The truth is, the ‘spoiling’ comes as a result of fear, lack of understanding, parenting tools, or preoccupation with other areas of our fast-paced, demanding lives.  This is then where guilt plays its role and adds to the reasons we give in, ignore teachable moments, or do or buy anything to make ourselves and our kids feel better…temporarily. Here are some other reasons why we overindulge our children: 1.  Concern of negative effects on child’s self-esteem.  Bogus! If anything…

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Attention! Sleep Deprived Parents…

By Blog, Uncategorized

The effects of sleep deprivation on adults is pretty sobering and if you are getting fragmented sleep at night, due to being woken by your sleep deprived baby or child, you will notice these symptoms taking their toll on your job and parenting performance. a)      Impaired decision making- logical/calculating b)      Impaired planning ability c)      Memory loss- short term (the kind that counts on the job!) d)      Lower stress tolerance/threshold (a big negative in parenting!) e)      Trouble concentrating f)       Decreased optimism and sociability g)      Impaired creativity and innovation h)      Increased food consumption and appetite i)        Anxiety j)        Higher resting blood pressure k)      Increased risk of pregnancy complications l)        Increased risk of premature delivery m)   Newborn health complications n)      Post partum depression Ask yourself this question… If this is what sleep deprivation does to the adult brain and its neurons, what does it do to a child’s, whose brain is still developing? …

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What Children Need From Parents: Beware the Extinction Burst!

By Blog, Uncategorized

By Dr. Gerald Stein Popular culture gives us just enough information to be confused. Not surprisingly, many parents who have never taken a psychology course know that it is important to set limits on their children and to be consistent in enforcing those limits. Despite this, a good many parents don’t have the strength of will to withstand the repeated pleading of their kids, or the energy to do so. If your child wants you to buy him a candy bar or a toy while you are in the store, many parents believe that it is simply easier to give in than to listen to the endless entreaties of their offspring. In some cases it can be too exhausting or overwhelming to have to deal with a persistent child, in other instances the parent might fear losing the child’s affection if the desired treat isn’t forthcoming, and in still other…

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Mothers Are Losing Their Instincts

By Blog, Uncategorized

The parent culture has changed dramatically in the last 15-20 years since raising my own four children. As a professional consultant, educator and coach, my job and my goal is to guide and support new parents. This business never would have made it fifteen years ago, but it’s thriving today. Why is this? In spite of all of the advances in care, baby gear, safety standards, and education resources for parents today, I think they (especially mothers) have it much more difficult than my mother, my grandmother, or I did. The new and greatest threat and challenge to new and expecting moms today is too much information. A mother can’t develop her own instincts for her child if every time she turns on the TV, computer, iPhone, or even heads out the door to her Mommy and Me group, she is frightened, confused, shamed, and bombarded with 200 different opinions…

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A lifetime of suffering for sleep deprived kids

By Blog, Uncategorized

The foundation for healthy sleep habits needs to be taught in infancy. When we wait too long to recognize, respect, and respond to our children’s need for sleep early on, things can quickly spiral out of control even before a child’s first birthday. We are noticing rampant rates of ADHD and Autism spectrum disorders being diagnosed in little ones as young as 3 years old, as sleep deprived parents are unable to recognize sleep deprivation in their own children. Realize that the timing of sleep is more important than the amount. A qualified child sleep consultant can help you get your child the deep restorative sleep they need. It’s not about sleeping in, or catching an ill-timed nap. This is junk sleep. And just as you wouldn’t feed your kids junk food, we don’t want to feed them junk sleep. Jet lag syndrome in adults is a sobering example of…

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ClubMomMe’s Family Fall Fest

By Events, Past Events, Uncategorized

Nov. 3, 2013 at Bel Air Bay Club 16801 Pacific Coast Hwy Pacific Palisades, CA BRING A WHEEL BARROW! Because there will be TONS of incredible luxury baby product giveaways! Fun zones, media zone, DJ & dance floor for the kiddos Celeb parent & expert panels for expecting moms, daddy’s & more!  “I am stoked to be on the same panel with maternity fashion goddess, Rosie Pope, for the expectant moms Q & A. I will also be on the Daddy Panel with all the cool daddy dude experts like Daddy Scrubs’ Robert Nickell!…Yes, I will be answering your sleep questions! Be sure to stop by the Jenni June table for a free satin sleep mask and a chance to win some of my favorite baby sleep products!

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